DOING MY PART
DAY 157 : Providentially, the Proverb I read today is God's little affirmation to me when I really need it the most. Here it is:
"Only a fool despises a parent's discipline; whoever learns from correction is wise." Proverb 15:5
In a week when my motherly correction has not been embraced as I had hoped, it was God's wink in my direction that I am not the fool in the "discipline" scenario - and on a day set aside to honor the invaluable role we mom's play. It was more than a little comforting - it was like a hug just when I needed it.
You've probably all been there as parents. Desiring to be diligent against the things that could bring trouble on your kids you sound the alarm only to be rebuffed as "out of touch" or some other dismissive qualifier. It's true what they say - as your kids get older, you get dumber - until they get older still and then, miraculously, you get wiser. Some of my kids are older and some are older still - oddly that makes me both dumber and wiser at the same time; it just depends on which one of my kids you ask.
What's so frustrating is that I really would prefer they all "learn from correction" when it is given. I mean, after all, I have been there and done that. Is it too much to ask that all of my young adult kids trust that I just might have greater insight at my age than the limited vision at theirs? Not only do I have to offer the correction, but I guess I also have to figure out how to make them learn from it - OR NOT!
Reading the proverb again, God reminded me it is not my responsibility what they do with what I offer them. God has assigned me the role of parent - and that means an obligation to give correction, discipline and wisdom. That is my part. The "learning from" part is out of my hands. That is their part. It's like leading the proverbial horse to water... you know you can get him there but you can't make the thing drink. When it comes to my children, they will learn from instruction and be wise, or they will reject it and be a fool. I have to come to grips with the fact that I can't make them learn from it. There are certainly ways to make them comply, especially when they are young - but at no age can I control if they learn anything I have to offer.
So, where does that leave me? On my knees where I have been since some delusional person let me, an inexperienced new mom, leave the hospital with my first child. Since that day, I have discovered that everything about parenting is trial and error... even 25 years into the process. That being said, I am keenly aware that I am not in it alone. God has given me direction as a mom that has proven trustworthy time and time again. I don't expect it to fail now that I am in the releasing phase of parenting.
My responsibility is for my part of the parent/child equation- only! Today God told me to stop striving to try to control the child part... whether my kids show themselves to be wise or foolish, God will be working with them just like He is working with me. He is in all parts of the equation!
That is a truth I want to remember not just in parenting. God is in all parts of the equation in every relationship in my life, in every challenge, in every goal, in every dream, in every disaster, in every time of waiting. Because that is true, just like dealing with my kids, I don't have to fret that they other parts of the equation, whether that be another person or a force of nature, will foil all that God intends. GOD IS IN IT! His only exception is that I do my part and let Him do His. My part will always be to honor His Word in my actions, let loving choices prevail, and trust.
1 Samuel 14
John 7:31-53
Psalm 109:1-31
Proverbs 15:5-7
"Only a fool despises a parent's discipline; whoever learns from correction is wise." Proverb 15:5
In a week when my motherly correction has not been embraced as I had hoped, it was God's wink in my direction that I am not the fool in the "discipline" scenario - and on a day set aside to honor the invaluable role we mom's play. It was more than a little comforting - it was like a hug just when I needed it.
You've probably all been there as parents. Desiring to be diligent against the things that could bring trouble on your kids you sound the alarm only to be rebuffed as "out of touch" or some other dismissive qualifier. It's true what they say - as your kids get older, you get dumber - until they get older still and then, miraculously, you get wiser. Some of my kids are older and some are older still - oddly that makes me both dumber and wiser at the same time; it just depends on which one of my kids you ask.
What's so frustrating is that I really would prefer they all "learn from correction" when it is given. I mean, after all, I have been there and done that. Is it too much to ask that all of my young adult kids trust that I just might have greater insight at my age than the limited vision at theirs? Not only do I have to offer the correction, but I guess I also have to figure out how to make them learn from it - OR NOT!
Reading the proverb again, God reminded me it is not my responsibility what they do with what I offer them. God has assigned me the role of parent - and that means an obligation to give correction, discipline and wisdom. That is my part. The "learning from" part is out of my hands. That is their part. It's like leading the proverbial horse to water... you know you can get him there but you can't make the thing drink. When it comes to my children, they will learn from instruction and be wise, or they will reject it and be a fool. I have to come to grips with the fact that I can't make them learn from it. There are certainly ways to make them comply, especially when they are young - but at no age can I control if they learn anything I have to offer.
So, where does that leave me? On my knees where I have been since some delusional person let me, an inexperienced new mom, leave the hospital with my first child. Since that day, I have discovered that everything about parenting is trial and error... even 25 years into the process. That being said, I am keenly aware that I am not in it alone. God has given me direction as a mom that has proven trustworthy time and time again. I don't expect it to fail now that I am in the releasing phase of parenting.
My responsibility is for my part of the parent/child equation- only! Today God told me to stop striving to try to control the child part... whether my kids show themselves to be wise or foolish, God will be working with them just like He is working with me. He is in all parts of the equation!
1 Samuel 14
John 7:31-53
Psalm 109:1-31
Proverbs 15:5-7
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