TIPS FOR RELOCATION
Day 169: When I was growing up my family relocated often. Every 2-3 years we moved to a new place where I would start a new school and start the process of finding new friends. From Kindergarten to 12th grade I started over in a new town seven times. Each time came with a period of anxiety as I tried to find where I fit in. U-Haul may call it "An Adventure in Moving" but I called it "Here we go again." While it had its challenges, to be sure, that background is probably to thank for my ability to be flexible and adapt well to change. Overall, I know that who I am is inextricably linked to my history so I don't begrudge not having a more settled childhood.
Knowing, though, that all that adapting comes with sacrifices, it was not the lifestyle that I wanted when I had my own family. Before I said "I do" I made it clear to my husband-to-be that I wanted to settle in one place where our kids could have a hometown - where I could have a hometown. I had done enough starting over to last me a lifetime.
I was too naive to realize at 22 years old that starting over takes many forms. Getting married was a kind of "starting over." Having kids was definitely starting over. I had to begin fresh when I changed jobs, become a stay at home mom, became a working mom, took on new ministry work, said goodbye to old friends, found new friends, lost parents, and built a new business. That's the short list. Moving was easy compared to some of the ways we have had to start over, the most monumental being when our last child moved out and we had to start over as empty-nesters.
We might not be relocating, but life is always on the move taking us to new places.
NEW can be disorienting. We can be thrown off balance emotionally and spiritually when we find ourselves in new and unfamiliar places. I certainly was when all our kids moved out. I had no idea how to be a parent without anyone at home to subject my parenting on. I had been an everyday-mom for 22 years. Then one morning I watched our youngest load the last of her clothes in the car and drive off to her new college apartment. That was exactly two years ago. I know because I made a note on this day's reading in my Bible. It says: Hannah's last day at home today. Why? What? How? How do a make a difference now?
As only God can do, He answered the questions I scribbled in the margins. He knew I would have those questions on THAT DAY and even though I didn't feel prepared, He was there to help me by sharing the story of some others who had to start over. With more resignation than anticipation, I began that day, and this one two years later, hearing from God.
After returning from 70 years in exile, a faithful group of Israelites rebuilt first the Temple under Ezra's leadership and then the walls of Jerusalem led by Nehemiah. The work was done and it was time to start over living in this new reality. Only, the people didn't really know what to do. None of them had ever lived in such circumstances before. They had been exiles. It was all new.
They did not know what to do in their new place in life, nor did they know how to start over; but they did know Who to ask.
Nehemiah 7:73 When the seventh month came and the Israelites had settled in their towns, 8:1 all the people came together as one in the square before the Water Gate. They told Ezra the teacher of the Law to bring out the Book of the Law of Moses, which the Lord had commanded for Israel.
2 So on the first day of the seventh month Ezra the priest brought the Law before the assembly, which was made up of men and women and all who were able to understand. 3 He read it aloud from daybreak till noon as he faced the square before the Water Gate in the presence of the men, women and others who could understand. And all the people listened attentively to the Book of the Law. . . 8 They read from the Book of the Law of God, making it clear and giving the meaning so that the people could understand what was being read.
The result of turning to God's word as they started over was that everyone worshiped God and agreed to what they had heard. They were so moved that they began to "weep as they listened to the words of the law." Nehemiah reminded them that it was a time to rejoice. "Don't be dejected and sad for the joy of the Lord is your strength." That God had brought them to a new beginning in a new place with a new purpose was cause to celebrate - even before all their questions were answered.. The joy of the Lord would be the strength they needed so "they celebrated with great joy because they had heard God's words and understood them."
After setting aside that one day of feasting and celebrating the new place God moved them to, they then turned to focusing on the details of God's word. They were in a new place, but their God was the same God, yesterday, today and forever. His principals and his instructions were for them in every place. Even if their circumstances changed they could find their purpose again by embracing how they fit in to the plans of the God who never changes.
The first thing they realized was that since the time of Joshua when they first entered the Promised Land they had neglected a festival that God commanded. So they celebrated the festival. Then they took time to pray and fast "as they confessed their own sins and the sins of their ancestors." Next they committed to praising God as they heard again about all of His faithfulness in all of the changes their ancestors went through. Obedient or disobedient, God showed Himself to be their Promise Keeper "a God of forgiveness, gracious and merciful, slow to become angry and full of unfailing love and mercy."
Then, remembering again His character and His calling, they embraced their new place and committed to following God faithfully as the starting point.
Nehemiah 7:73-12:26
1 Corinthians 9:1-10:33
Psalm 33:12-34:22
Proverbs 21:11-16
Knowing, though, that all that adapting comes with sacrifices, it was not the lifestyle that I wanted when I had my own family. Before I said "I do" I made it clear to my husband-to-be that I wanted to settle in one place where our kids could have a hometown - where I could have a hometown. I had done enough starting over to last me a lifetime.
I was too naive to realize at 22 years old that starting over takes many forms. Getting married was a kind of "starting over." Having kids was definitely starting over. I had to begin fresh when I changed jobs, become a stay at home mom, became a working mom, took on new ministry work, said goodbye to old friends, found new friends, lost parents, and built a new business. That's the short list. Moving was easy compared to some of the ways we have had to start over, the most monumental being when our last child moved out and we had to start over as empty-nesters.We might not be relocating, but life is always on the move taking us to new places.
NEW can be disorienting. We can be thrown off balance emotionally and spiritually when we find ourselves in new and unfamiliar places. I certainly was when all our kids moved out. I had no idea how to be a parent without anyone at home to subject my parenting on. I had been an everyday-mom for 22 years. Then one morning I watched our youngest load the last of her clothes in the car and drive off to her new college apartment. That was exactly two years ago. I know because I made a note on this day's reading in my Bible. It says: Hannah's last day at home today. Why? What? How? How do a make a difference now?
As only God can do, He answered the questions I scribbled in the margins. He knew I would have those questions on THAT DAY and even though I didn't feel prepared, He was there to help me by sharing the story of some others who had to start over. With more resignation than anticipation, I began that day, and this one two years later, hearing from God.
After returning from 70 years in exile, a faithful group of Israelites rebuilt first the Temple under Ezra's leadership and then the walls of Jerusalem led by Nehemiah. The work was done and it was time to start over living in this new reality. Only, the people didn't really know what to do. None of them had ever lived in such circumstances before. They had been exiles. It was all new.
They did not know what to do in their new place in life, nor did they know how to start over; but they did know Who to ask.
Nehemiah 7:73 When the seventh month came and the Israelites had settled in their towns, 8:1 all the people came together as one in the square before the Water Gate. They told Ezra the teacher of the Law to bring out the Book of the Law of Moses, which the Lord had commanded for Israel.
2 So on the first day of the seventh month Ezra the priest brought the Law before the assembly, which was made up of men and women and all who were able to understand. 3 He read it aloud from daybreak till noon as he faced the square before the Water Gate in the presence of the men, women and others who could understand. And all the people listened attentively to the Book of the Law. . . 8 They read from the Book of the Law of God, making it clear and giving the meaning so that the people could understand what was being read.
The result of turning to God's word as they started over was that everyone worshiped God and agreed to what they had heard. They were so moved that they began to "weep as they listened to the words of the law." Nehemiah reminded them that it was a time to rejoice. "Don't be dejected and sad for the joy of the Lord is your strength." That God had brought them to a new beginning in a new place with a new purpose was cause to celebrate - even before all their questions were answered.. The joy of the Lord would be the strength they needed so "they celebrated with great joy because they had heard God's words and understood them."
After setting aside that one day of feasting and celebrating the new place God moved them to, they then turned to focusing on the details of God's word. They were in a new place, but their God was the same God, yesterday, today and forever. His principals and his instructions were for them in every place. Even if their circumstances changed they could find their purpose again by embracing how they fit in to the plans of the God who never changes.
The first thing they realized was that since the time of Joshua when they first entered the Promised Land they had neglected a festival that God commanded. So they celebrated the festival. Then they took time to pray and fast "as they confessed their own sins and the sins of their ancestors." Next they committed to praising God as they heard again about all of His faithfulness in all of the changes their ancestors went through. Obedient or disobedient, God showed Himself to be their Promise Keeper "a God of forgiveness, gracious and merciful, slow to become angry and full of unfailing love and mercy."
Then, remembering again His character and His calling, they embraced their new place and committed to following God faithfully as the starting point.
Nehemiah 9:31 What a gracious and merciful God you are! And
now, our God, the great and mighty and awesome God, who keeps his
covenant of unfailing love, do not let all the hardships we have
suffered seem insignificant to you... today we are slaves here in the land of plenty that you gave our ancestors. We are slaves among all this abundance. The lush produce of this land piles up in the hands of the kings whom you have set over us because of our sins. . . 38 Yet in spit of all this, we are making a solemn promise and putting it in writing.
It was clear to all those who had resettled in the land that they were there starting over according to the will of God. And after spending time hearing and understanding His word, they were committed to living in that new place according to the principals of God. That would be their starting place and they trusted it would get them where God intended them to go.
I love that the next two chapters in Nehemiah document a long list of specific names of people who were starting over and the role they played in this crucial time in God's plan for Israel. It reminds me that every single person was relocated for a reason. The ones that looked for it and embraced it were remembered for it.
Two years ago, this obscure story about a rag tag group of exiles returning to their ruined city launched my own season of parental exile (i.e. empty nest-hood) not as a desperate search for significance, but as a season of purpose and building. My last note scribbled in the margin of my Bible that day reads: What opportunities will come with being free from day to day parenting? How can I obey God in a new way and build something of purpose? What will be recorded about my relocation if I commit to following God in the starting over place?
This is not the last time I will start over in my life. There will be many more times of "relocation" ahead. When they come, I hope I will remember the moving tips I learned and do as these exiles did: Embrace the change, Embrace the One who permitted the change, Embrace forgiveness where I need it, and Embrace God's principals so the change will have lasting purpose.
It was clear to all those who had resettled in the land that they were there starting over according to the will of God. And after spending time hearing and understanding His word, they were committed to living in that new place according to the principals of God. That would be their starting place and they trusted it would get them where God intended them to go.
I love that the next two chapters in Nehemiah document a long list of specific names of people who were starting over and the role they played in this crucial time in God's plan for Israel. It reminds me that every single person was relocated for a reason. The ones that looked for it and embraced it were remembered for it.
Two years ago, this obscure story about a rag tag group of exiles returning to their ruined city launched my own season of parental exile (i.e. empty nest-hood) not as a desperate search for significance, but as a season of purpose and building. My last note scribbled in the margin of my Bible that day reads: What opportunities will come with being free from day to day parenting? How can I obey God in a new way and build something of purpose? What will be recorded about my relocation if I commit to following God in the starting over place?
This is not the last time I will start over in my life. There will be many more times of "relocation" ahead. When they come, I hope I will remember the moving tips I learned and do as these exiles did: Embrace the change, Embrace the One who permitted the change, Embrace forgiveness where I need it, and Embrace God's principals so the change will have lasting purpose.
Nehemiah 7:73-12:26
1 Corinthians 9:1-10:33
Psalm 33:12-34:22
Proverbs 21:11-16
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