DECLARING INDEPENDENCE
DAY 155-156: As our kids are moving into young adulthood we have noticed they approach it in different ways. Our oldest son, now married and blessedly employed, was very pragmatic. He has always acknowledged that our support was crucial to his well-being. As a student, while balancing work with school, he happily and eagerly "allowed" us to help him financially. He was never too embarrassed or uncomfortable to let us know that he had a need. He was gratefully dependent.
Our youngest son has a very different view. Still a student, he also needs our help while in college. But he sees his dependence as a sign of weakness at takes our support begrudgingly. His fervent goal in life is to be able to declare his independence. He desperately wants to say he is making it on his own... and he does say that - often. He is very proud of the fact that he pays his rent, utilities and living expenses without our help. He touts that he's a man and that he is living independently. We are very proud of his desire to take care of himself and his efforts to do so. We just find it amusing that he chooses to block out the fact that his dad provides one of the jobs that provides his income, that we pay his tuition and buy his books, and we help with gas and food money when he runs short. He may be in denial, but the reality is this: for all of our kids, our lives makes their lives possible.
We have always expected them to help themselves as much as possible but have never left them to do it alone - and as parents, we never will. Our support will certainly change in nature as they move from youth, to young adults, to adulthood, but they will always be able to depend on us. So, while we hope that they will grow to be self-supporting, self-governing and self-sacrificing people, it really isn't possible that they will ever be truly "independent" if you take the definition literally.
If those are the definitions of INDEPENDENCE may our children never reach such a lonely status. Can we be without influence? Can we be without authority? How is it possible to depend upon nothing for existence? Do we really want to be in a position not to rely on another for support? These questions were all answered for David, and for us, in the Bible passage in today's reading.
David had just returned home from celebrating and worshiping God as Israel brought back the Ark of the Lord. David was King. David was the leader. David was Rich. David was secure. It looked like at last, the young shepherd boy who sang for King Saul was finally the strong, anointed, independent leader of Israel. Now he was ready to use his independence. God had provided for David, so David had a desire, and he thought the ability, to provide for God by building God a house.
1 Chronicles 17:1 When David was settled in his palace, he summoned Nathan the prophet. “Look,” David said, “I am living in a beautiful cedar palace, but the Ark of the Lord’s Covenant is out there under a tent!”
2 Nathan replied to David, “Do whatever you have in mind, for God is with you.”
But Nathan spoke too soon. God answered for Himself, giving Nathan a message to declare to David. Notice how God sets the record straight about who provides for whom in this relationship.
1 Chronicles 16:37-43
1 Chronicles 17
1 Chronicles 18
Romans 2:1-24
Psalm 10:16-18
Proverbs 19:8-9
Our youngest son has a very different view. Still a student, he also needs our help while in college. But he sees his dependence as a sign of weakness at takes our support begrudgingly. His fervent goal in life is to be able to declare his independence. He desperately wants to say he is making it on his own... and he does say that - often. He is very proud of the fact that he pays his rent, utilities and living expenses without our help. He touts that he's a man and that he is living independently. We are very proud of his desire to take care of himself and his efforts to do so. We just find it amusing that he chooses to block out the fact that his dad provides one of the jobs that provides his income, that we pay his tuition and buy his books, and we help with gas and food money when he runs short. He may be in denial, but the reality is this: for all of our kids, our lives makes their lives possible. We have always expected them to help themselves as much as possible but have never left them to do it alone - and as parents, we never will. Our support will certainly change in nature as they move from youth, to young adults, to adulthood, but they will always be able to depend on us. So, while we hope that they will grow to be self-supporting, self-governing and self-sacrificing people, it really isn't possible that they will ever be truly "independent" if you take the definition literally.
ACCORDING TO WEBSTERS: in·de·pend·ent describes a person who is:
1. not influenced or controlled by others in matters of opinion, conduct, etc.; thinking or acting for oneself: an independent thinker.
2. not subject to another's authority or jurisdiction; autonomous; free
3. not influenced by the thought or action of others: independent research.
4. not dependent; not depending or contingent upon something else for existence, operation, etc.
5. not relying on another or others for aid or support.
If those are the definitions of INDEPENDENCE may our children never reach such a lonely status. Can we be without influence? Can we be without authority? How is it possible to depend upon nothing for existence? Do we really want to be in a position not to rely on another for support? These questions were all answered for David, and for us, in the Bible passage in today's reading.
David had just returned home from celebrating and worshiping God as Israel brought back the Ark of the Lord. David was King. David was the leader. David was Rich. David was secure. It looked like at last, the young shepherd boy who sang for King Saul was finally the strong, anointed, independent leader of Israel. Now he was ready to use his independence. God had provided for David, so David had a desire, and he thought the ability, to provide for God by building God a house.
1 Chronicles 17:1 When David was settled in his palace, he summoned Nathan the prophet. “Look,” David said, “I am living in a beautiful cedar palace, but the Ark of the Lord’s Covenant is out there under a tent!”
2 Nathan replied to David, “Do whatever you have in mind, for God is with you.”
But Nathan spoke too soon. God answered for Himself, giving Nathan a message to declare to David. Notice how God sets the record straight about who provides for whom in this relationship.
4 “Go and tell my servant David, ‘. . . You are not the one to build a house for me to live in. 5 I
have never lived in a house, from the day I brought the Israelites out
of Egypt until this very day.... 6 Yet no matter where I have gone with the Israelites, I have never once complained to Israel’s leaders, the shepherds of my people. I have never asked them, “Why haven’t you built me a beautiful cedar house?”’
7 "‘This is what the Lord
of Heaven’s Armies has declared: I took you from tending sheep in the
pasture and I selected you to be the leader of my people Israel. 8 I
have been with you wherever you have gone, and I have destroyed all
your enemies before your eyes. Now I will make your name as famous as
anyone who has ever lived on the earth! 9 And
I will provide a homeland for my people Israel, planting them in a
secure place where they will never be disturbed. Evil nations won’t
oppress them as they’ve done in the past, 10 starting from the time I appointed judges to rule my people Israel. And I will defeat all your enemies. Furthermore, I declare that the Lord will build a house for you—a dynasty of kings! 11 For
when you die and join your ancestors, I will raise up one of your
descendants, one of your sons, and I will make his kingdom strong. 12 He is the one who will build a house—a temple—for me. And I will secure his throne forever. 13 I will be his father, and he will be my son. I will never take my favor from him as I took it from the one who ruled before you. 14 I will confirm him as king over my house and my kingdom for all time, and his throne will be secure forever.’”
David's independent thinking almost lead him away from the will of God. David declared what he would do for God. God responded by declaring what He has done and would do for David. As great as David had gotten, as much as he could do for others, He could not meet a need for God. He was still dependent on God for support, aid and authority. God, in His graciousness, taught him this again by both reminding David what He had done and promising what He would do: David desired to build a house of cedar for God; God would build an eternal house and dynasty for David. God did not need David to provide for Him, but David could never achieve that kind of dynasty for himself.
David was dependent on God for it all; God needed David for nothing. In his newly "independent" state, God must have known David needed that reminder. To his credit, David instantly understood:
David learned with certainty, and revealed these lesson to us,:
I for one, am happy to DECLARE MY DEPENDENCE!
NOTE: The story continues in the next blog to see how God graciously allows David to be a part of God's plan to build a Temple to God's glory. The blessings just keep coming!
David's independent thinking almost lead him away from the will of God. David declared what he would do for God. God responded by declaring what He has done and would do for David. As great as David had gotten, as much as he could do for others, He could not meet a need for God. He was still dependent on God for support, aid and authority. God, in His graciousness, taught him this again by both reminding David what He had done and promising what He would do: David desired to build a house of cedar for God; God would build an eternal house and dynasty for David. God did not need David to provide for Him, but David could never achieve that kind of dynasty for himself.
David was dependent on God for it all; God needed David for nothing. In his newly "independent" state, God must have known David needed that reminder. To his credit, David instantly understood:
16 Then King David went in and sat before the Lord and prayed,
“Who am I, O Lord God, and what is my family, that you have brought me this far? 17 And
now, O God, in addition to everything else, you speak of giving your
servant a lasting dynasty! You speak as though I were someone very
great, O Lord God!
18 “What more can I say to you about the way you have honored me? You know what your servant is really like. 19 For the sake of your servant, O Lord, and according to your will, you have done all these great things and have made them known.
20 “O Lord, there is no one like you.. . . 27 And
now, it has pleased you to bless the house of your servant, so that it
will continue forever before you. For when you grant a blessing, O Lord, it is an eternal blessing!”
David learned with certainty, and revealed these lesson to us,:
- God will never depend on man
- God's children will never be independent of God, His influence, opinion, support, authority and love.
- God delights in providing His blessings to His children
- Being dependent of God is an honor not a weakness
I for one, am happy to DECLARE MY DEPENDENCE!
NOTE: The story continues in the next blog to see how God graciously allows David to be a part of God's plan to build a Temple to God's glory. The blessings just keep coming!
1 Chronicles 16:37-43
1 Chronicles 17
1 Chronicles 18
Romans 2:1-24
Psalm 10:16-18
Proverbs 19:8-9
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